Sunday, 30 January 2011

..bi-anne and other daughters..

..I followed with interest the fight for Bi-Anne..and try to see in her all of my children who were affected when their mothers and I parted...we had our differences, their mothers and me..mainly it was my gallivanting ways, but I try not to aggravate the already bad situation by imposing my will on the children..a few days after the parting of ways with the first, the children, six girls and a boy stood in a line with the elder among them telling me that they chose to stay with their mother...I was stunned for a minute by their show of solidarity..but I agreed...I leave you this house and everything in it...I remember saying...and plucked myself out of the scene..

..my reasoning was simple..I tried not to change what they were familiar with..the two eldest girls were in UITM, Jengka Pusat and Kuantan and the third in TFC, Johore..and I visited them on average once a month..they have their mother..no reason why they should lose too much of their father..after all I was with a younger wife...

..in the case of Bi-Anne, its obvious that unlike what her name implies, she cannot be divided into two...I hope that reason will prevail and she be allowed to stay with the parent she is most comfortable with..she is, after all, eleven..and eleven-year olds these days are as much an adult as some 66-year olds that I know...

7 comments:

Cat-in-Sydney said...

Abe Mat,
Yes....it is always the children who suffer when parents separate. Even furkids. Some people fight for custody of their pets. purrr...meow!

pakmat said...

..wow, mydearcat, that was fast..I barely had it out and you came in with your comment..

I feel for her, bi-anne..(what an apt name)..to my mind, uprooting her to London is grossly unfair..and why cant her mother respect her wish?..to stay with father?..I know how he feels..I was there once..as parents we take care of our interests..time to care of their interest, too..

STEEST said...

It's always your honesty that keeps me coming back to check your latest posts.

:)

mekyam said...

pakmat, i googled cerita bi-anne. kesiannya! my heart goes out to her and her dad. i think the mother is just one selfish beaatch. it sounded like it's all abt entitlement and scoring with her, not abt the child's emotional welfare.

and what is it with those judges giving the mother custody when she hardly spent 8 months with bi-anne? are they congenital stoops or what?

btw, this reminds me of cerita nabi sulaiman and the two women who came before him tussling over an infant.

two women claimed to be the mother of an infant and gave convincing evidences to support their claim.

king solomon in his wisdom said since he cldn't established from their account who rightfully owned the child, the child should be cut into two and both women shld then have half. the real mother straightaway withdrew her claim. and the prophet straightaway gave her back her child!


those bloody judges obviously never heard of the story!

anneaziz said...

Pakmat,

11 year old is by Islamic standards already mumayyiz and would be given a say in the matter.

Trouble is we all try to be smarter than GOD.

Uncle Lee said...

Hi PakMat, regret to read of your situation. I guess life can have its circumstances and hiccups.
You stay healthy, and keep well. Best wishes for the Rabbit year,
Lee.

pakmat said...

dear steest..just telling the story of somethingI know best..my life..my children read my blog..if anything it gives them a window into their father's heart..

dear mekyam..gets to you, hey> :)..but you r right, of course..sometimes parents are selfish..as parents we put our interest ahead of our children..

dear anne..11yr olds are adults..and old those years she has been staying with her father..

dear uncle lee..happy new year, lee..have a jolly good one..cheers..