Sunday, 5 September 2010

..I am standing again..

..and so, with the end of Ramadhan near...and IdilFitri just around the corner, I am standing again to be counted..

..I stood before my wife and ex-wives..as you have forgave me before, please find the grace in your hearts to forgive me again..I am not the best of husbands or ex-husbands..nor the man you all thought I was or would be...I do not have the qualities that you all seeked..I am just what I was borned to be..a man without pretensions, trying hard to carry the mantle of caliphship and faltered trying...

..and before my children, I stood again..please forgive this old man who is standing now in front of you as your father..for I am never the best of fathers...there were things that I should have done but didn't..and some things that I shouldn't but did..and there were times when my ego blinded me to your needs...please forgive your father his inadequacies..his faults and his wrongs..for nothing mitigates my love for you, no matter how thick..no matter how thin..

..and I stand before my friends, old and new..forgive me if I did not turned out to be the friend in need and in deed..or if my words speak louder than my actions..or if I did not turned up to your expectations..for I shall always be me..



..above all, I stood in front of my God, Allah..


..I am standing before you, Lord, in all humility, seeking Your Forgiveness..for all my failures and sins..for my misdeeds and transgressions..for my weakness, which are many..as against Your Mercy which is Boundless..Forgive me, Lord, this humble servant of yours.. who tried his utmost to bask in Your Light during this Ramadan..


..selamat hari raya aidilfitri..

21 comments:

Wan Sharif said...

Thank you for reminding me to do the same.. here I am teary eyed ..asking for your forgiveness as well..

Pak Idrus said...

Pakmat, After all we are a human being and being human is the best things we could do under any circumstances.

Have a nice day.

NanaDJ said...

Saudara Mat,
Thank you for the reminder. I wanted to say more but they are better left unsaid.
Semoga diberkati dan dirahmati Allah.Selamat Hari Raya

June Malik said...

sama-sama kita PakMat, bermaafan di hari mulia ini :)

Pak Zawi said...

PakMat,
Syabas. Not many men would own up to his misdeeds. You are an exception.

rizal hashim said...

PakMat, have fun and enjoy life PakMat...raya is a time to celebrate life, warts and all...

Eid Mubarak!

Tommy Yewfigure said...

Pakmat, like i said in your fb, u r a gentleman & a scholar. It takes a brave man to openly declared that in a public domain. We r all human after all & we make mistakes along the way, heck such is life. Don't take it too hard on yourself!

Ain't that a kick in the head

Salam,
Tommy

Tumin said...

Pakmat, your humility reflects your big heart with good wisdom. Just glad to be in your circle of friends. Also, thank you reminding us of always making peace with others and ourselves, especially.

Selamat Hari Raya!

Best Regards,
Tumin

Red Alfa said...

Salam Pak Mat

There are some people who I could only seek for their forgiveness and knowing that they won't give.

When you sought forgiveness from your ex-wives in public, how novel an idea I should try!

(I am presuming ex-wives don't ever forgive!)

Selamat Hari Raya, maaf zahir & batin!

Cat-in-Sydney said...

Abe Mat,
Bermaaf-maafan, bersalam-salaman...I say, let bygones be bygones....

EID MUBARAK!!!!

purrrsss,
Angelina, Brad, Mama & Dad

mekyam said...

selamat hari raya kpd pakmat dan keluarga!

salah silap, terkasar bahasa, minta maaf ya, pakmat.

~Covert_Operations'78~ said...

A touching and heartwarming entry, Pakmat. I seek your forgiveness too, if I have been rude or harsh in my comments or blogposts or if I have ever unknowingly offended you. May you have a Blessed Ramadhan Al-Mubarak.

Anonymous said...

salam pak mat,

ex-wives? meaning pak mat with one wife je laa ek..so u r no more a polygamous...(tul ke spelling)mmmm....

take care pak mat...

rose

YuinTing said...

Dear Pakmat, Selamat Hari Raya and wish you have a wonderful time with your family!

pakmat said...

..friends,its forgiving yourself that is difficult..but we must..for in doing so we can forgive others..so, thank you, all..lets have a joyous hoilday..and forget awhile the mess we r leaving our children's children..cheers..

Uncle Lee said...

Hello PakMat, salam Aidilfitri, wishing you and all at home selamat hari raya and all best wishes, from Canada, Lee.

Pat said...

Dear Pak Mat,

You are only human, just like the rest of us, so who are we judge you. All that matters is that you try, and continue to try, and that is of the utmost importance.

Have a wonderful hari raya Aidil Fitri - with your loved ones. May you all be blessed.

Anonymous said...

salam pak mat. selamat hari raya. maaf zahir batin. this is a beautiful entry, i am touched. hope ur ex-es and children read this and accept u as what u are.May Allah bless u and answer ur prayer Pakmat. Eid Mubarak.
Dr ID

Anonymous said...

Salam Pakmat,

Have been a silent reader for some time. Like your style of writing. Selamat Menyambut Aidilfitri.

Rozi

sot said...

Big entry...TQ for reminding us all that we are human with the past behind us, the present we are living in, and the future not so far away. Maaf Zahir Batin.

pakmat said...

..salam raya,,friends..thank you, all..the past is for us to ponder upon..the present to put our faith on..cheers..may you all be blessed..