Monday 1 April 2013

..relatives far removed..

..we are fond of saying that if we did not get to know of our relatives...uncles, aunties, cousins, fourth cousins...and those far removed...that if we did not try to know them, then there are no better than strangers...and with todays trend of leaving and uprooting ourselves from our home villages and seeking a livelihood somewhere else, chances of getting to know and be close with our relatives are getting slimmer..and harder...we are closer to those around us, our friends...

..and so it was  with pakmat...Lord knows how many relatives that I had, whatever side I care to mention...children of my brothers of common parents numbered more than twenty...brothers and sisters sharing a common father, for the late Hamid, my father, as also his sons, was known to have several wives..God knows how many there are...my half-sister in the city...there is no, as the Kelantanese are fond of saying, 'gimari' among us...we do not relate and we do not communicate...hence the absence of 'gimari'..


..it was with a tinge of regret that on the night of the tahlil for my late brother, Adnan, where all his children gathered, pakmat hardly knew any of them...and they are my very own nephews and nieces....we were all busy with our own lifes...as pakmat was busy trying to find my own little plot on this little piece of earth, that I forgot I have relatives...I went my separate way...and it was selfish of me...it was downright arrogant...for my children do not have the apportunity to get to know their cousins, uncles and aunties....my actions denied them from knowing them...

..so I told my children that things are about to change...I am gonna bridge this self-imposed gap...through Facebook, through Whatsapp...through normal calls...and through visits and invitations...for, yes, we share the same sky and the same earth...there is no reason why we should not meet...for we are, after all, relatives...

9 comments:

K T said...

molek benar lah tu, pak mat. whenever i have issues with my siblings, i remember that they are all my parents' children. i love my parents dearly, so i love my siblings unconditionally ...

naniasda said...

As Salam Pak Mat,
First time I am leaving a comment here and I truly agree with you about relatives far removed. Recently I attended a cousin's son wedding, mmg tak kenal langsung anak-anak cousin ni sebab tidok 'gimari'. Masa ucap tahniah pada pengantin pun tak nak tengok mata kita, mok sepupu dia and who is to blame...

Unknown said...

..as salam KT..thank you..I am learning to love them unconditionally, too..:)

..as salam naniasda..then, welcome to my blog..I am having my fair share of silent readers...as once, I had my fair share of commentors...:)

..been reading about your exsperiences in the holy land..try to read mine, if you have the time..unlike you, it was my first time there...please, Lord, let it not be my last...

naniasda said...

As Salam Pakmat,
Actually I have being a follower to your blog for quite some time and thank you for following my blog too :)...and yes I have read about your time in the holy land too and Insha Allah it will not be your last..have a nice day :)

Al-Manar said...

You are not an exception. Whenever I happen to be at a relative's gathering I have to force a familiar smile in response to 'Ki, Wah, Tok, Ayah , Abang etc' thrown at me. I wonder whether I should follow your foot step to remedy the sisuation. Make another posting later to update us on your progress.

Unknown said...

..thank you, Al-Manar...I will try..

School Of Tots said...

Best platform to get together maybe at Kenduri kendara & Hari raya. Or at funeral of relatives. But the most important is 'ikhlas' menghubung siratul rahim. We all relatives.

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